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Procrastinating Suicide

by Item Caligo

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“Just look at this life: the insolence and idleness of the strong, the ignorance and brutishness of the weak, impossible poverty all around us, overcrowding, degeneracy, drunkenness, hypocrisy, lies...Yet in all the houses and streets it's quiet, peaceful; of the fifty thousand people who live in town there is not one who would cry out or become loudly indignant. We see those who go to the market to buy food, eat during the day, sleep during the night, who talk their nonsense, get married, grow old, complacently drag their dead to the cemetery; but we don't see or hear those who suffer, and the horrors of life go on somewhere behind the scenes. Everything is quiet, peaceful, and only mute statistics protest: so many gone mad, so many buckets drunk, so many children dead of malnutrition... And this order is obviously necessary; obviously the happy man feels good only because the unhappy bear their burden silently, and without that silence happiness would be impossible. It's a general hypnosis. At the door of every happy, contented man somebody should stand with a little hammer, constantly tapping, to remind him that unhappy people exist, that however happy he may be, sooner or later life will show him its claws, some calamity will befall him - illness, poverty, loss - and nobody will hear or see, just as he doesn't hear or see others now. But there is nobody with a little hammer, the happy man lives on, and the petty cares of life stir him only slightly, as wind stirs an aspen and everything is fine.”
(Anton Chekhov)

credits

released November 29, 2017

All tracks written by Sergey Epifanov.
"The 21 sacraments" dedicated to Walter Sullivan from "Silent Hill 4:The room".
Field-recording in "Gray winter fog" by Dynamicell
freesound.org/people/Dynamicell/sounds/17553
Photo by Denis Khripyakov.
www.flickr.com/photos/32903203@N02/

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Item Caligo Volgograd, Russia

Will anyone remember you when the time comes?

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